60 & beyond, June

June 1 – It’s okay for a man to get lost in the wilderness.  It’s not okay for a man who gets lost in the wilderness to scream like a girl.

June 2 – There’s nothing like the sound of boys laughing at camp, except perhaps boys laughing…  anytime.

June 3 – When a boy returns from playing a baseball game, ask him how they did.  If he says that they lost but played well, and then repeats it, that’s your cue to ask him how HE did.  Nothing cheers a boy like talking about how he shined in an otherwise dreary experience.

June 4 – Nakeyaking, a great experience, on par with shnuding.  (John 21:7)

June 5 – If you have to shoot a really heinous bad guy in the back, that’s too bad.  He should see it coming.

June 6 – I’m trying to watch a British news report.  I wish they would learn to speak English.

June 7 – It has come up recently so I might as well report.  There are seven King James cuss words:  piss, hell, damn, bastard, prick, whore, and ass.  I use none of them…  all at the same time.

June 8 – I am the assistant chief of all sinners.  (I Timothy 1:15)

June 9 – The more I learn of the daily conversations my wife has with her mother, the harder it will be to speak at my mother-in-law’s funeral.

June 10 – Working on an old Ford truck on a warm summer day is a pleasingly peaceful experience, especially when it and you have shared some unbelievable experiences the last 20 years.

June 11 – Brown recluse spiders are one of the most beautiful creatures on the planet – elegant, fascinating, quick, and deadly.  I guess beauty IS in the eye of the beholder.

June 12 – Children and teens are famished for lack of someone who will train them up so they will have something from which not to depart (Proverbs 22:6).  This, while adults choke to death on the meat of the Word.  That’s the lesson I see in Numbers 11.  Why else would God name the place of burial for all the people who lusted for and died eating quail:  Kibroth-hattaavah.  It’s a strong warning to bloated, lazy, self-serving Christians who lust for the Word.  And we wonder why kids abandon God as they get older.

June 13 – I occurs to me that I might have been a little over the top on the previous day’s observation.  Good.

June 14 – My spear is not for killing the animals I’m hunting, but for defending myself against the animals that are hunting me.

June 15 – A great nature experience can be enjoyed when one is as natural as spiritually possible.

June 16 – He who dies with the most toys is just as dead as he who dies with no toys.  Maybe deader.

June 17 – If I’m going to say or do something that causes people to get angry or offended about Kingdom matters, I want it to be significant and worth it.  After all, they’ll be mad at Jesus and not me (John 15:18-21).  I shouldn’t take great pleasure in that but sometimes it is grin-worthy.

June 18 – There’s a difference between making a mistake and committing a sin.  I may or may not regret a mistake but I’m always sorry for sin.

June 19 – Between my wife and me, we have 70 years of faithful, vow-keeping marriage experience.  I think we know a thing or two about it by now and can adamantly state that marriage is sacred, between one man and one woman, and eternal.  Especially eternal.  Especially eternal.

June 20 – Loud music makes the inconsiderate listener go deaf.  He deserves it.  But his irritated neighbor doesn’t deserve being involved in the process.

June 21 – I’ve often wondered what type of questions they ask polled Herefords.

June 22 – I’ve never liked the phrase “God don’t make no junk” in part because it’s grammatically incorrect.  I’m assured, though, that God doesn’t want any of my body parts called junk either.

June 23 – I can safely toss my grandkids into the air with precision thanks to much practice with my own children when they were their age, albeit trial and error practice.

June 24 – Never insult a man by doing for him what he is fully capable of doing for himself.  Ever.

June 25 – To be an expert in firearms (“gunology,” if you will), you must know much about many things like chemistry, geometry, history, mechanics, meteorology, physics, and physiology.  To be an expert marksman, you just need to know your weapon.

June 26 – When most people think of “weapons,” they think of guns, knives, and maybe archery.  The manlier among us also think of blowguns, boomerangs, clubs, hatchets, slings, spears, swords, walking sticks, and any other number of “things” that can be turned into weaponry by a resourceful individual.

June 27 – If I had to limit myself to five items to use outdoors, they would be a sarong, knife, water bottle, fire starter, and flashlight.  If I had to choose three items, they would be a sarong, knife, and a water bottle.  If I had to choose one item, it would be my brain.

June 28 – If I had to limit myself to just three firearms (forbid it!), they would be a good shotgun (I don’t care what gauge or action), a lever action .30/30 rifle, and a .22LR handgun (preferably a revolver).  If I had to limit myself to just one firearm, it would be a proven .22LR rifle (I don’t care what action).  Currently, my choice is an old (vintage 1933) Remington Md. 12 .22LR with a Lyman R12 rear sight.  If that gun could talk, even my old, braggadocios truck would not believe the stories.

June 29 – I learned to swim in Lake Erie.  White caps, undercurrents, and shifting sand bars were my playthings.

June 30 – How did the people of the Bible distinguish between a Jew and a Gentile man without intentionally looking under the guy’s attire or outside of some casual naked experience?